Weird Beard - Something Something Darkside

Sold to me (though "sold" is a bad word as the chaps at Wierd Beard were kind enough to give me this one on the house,) as an imperial stout with the hop levels of a double IPA (or regular IPA, I prefer to think it was double IPA.) Though massively impressive as a concept, it was redundant, they had me at "something something." Weird Beard have something for everyone... With a beard; whether it's a geeky nod to a beloved cartoon, which in itself is a geeky nod to a beloved movie classic, or simply making a massive 9% dark beer that smells like caramac and cut grass.

The smell really is something to behold, it's like walking into a fudge shop where they make the fudge just behind the counter. Have you ever been into one of those? Don't, you sweat through your shirt within the first 5 seconds because of the sauna temperatures, which puts you off the fudge because you imagine that the fudge you're about to buy must contain a LOT of flop (and probably pit) sweat... The smell, however, is awesome. The beer pours well and leaves moderate speckling (though I'm pretty sure a lot of this depends on what kind of glass you use,) giving the impression that the beer is a rugged little scamp that gets into all sorts of japes when all the servants and gardeners are off having tiffin.

It tastes thick, with the duel tastes of bitter hops and sweet fudge running through the core. It even leaves that slight, pleasurable, oily sensation around your tongue and lips without leaving any residue. You know the kind, right? When you eat something awful and sugary and fatty that manages to contain cream, sugar and other bad things like, I don't know... Heroin? And it leaves, what I can only describe as, the opposite of a tingle?

I don't think I've ever tasted anything like this before, it's a supremely decadent dessert beer that's dangerously easy to drink and could put you under the table quicker than if Darth Sidious force lightninged the utter s*** out of you! At 9% it's packing a lot of... Force... You can't joke around with this one, it's not one for BANTHA... The texture really is thick though, you could almost say it's... CHEWY...

These Star Wars puns doing anything for you? Because, frankly, I think they're hilarious.

Food Suggestion:

Drink this if you like: If you're a fan of all the quite exceptionally mad, barrel aged, sweeter than sweet yet darker than dark, De Molens then you'll be on board with this quicker than Luke Skywalker boarding Jabba's sail barge. (Not sure he did that... He sure is quick though and he probably could have if he really wanted to.)

Drink this if you like: Thick, ridiculous, imperial stouts like iStout or Even More Jesus.

Oh... Something Something Something Complete