Brooklyn Brewery - Lager & Monster Ale

Brooklyn Lager - 5.2%

This, as far as I can remember, is probably one of my favourite mainstream lagers, not because it's particularly fancy, because I've definitely had fancier, and not because it's ground breaking in it's style or the way it tastes. It's one of my favourites because it simply IS... Which sounds horribly pretentious but stick with me for a moment and I'll explain.

I don't expect a lot from American lager that makes it to this country, Budweiser has set a horrible bench mark that anyone who even remotely tries will utterly obliterate, yet for years, decades even, the benchmark remained untouched. Then, one day, I saw a bottle of Brooklyn Lager in my local supermarket and I thought "meh, might as well give it a shot, I like the way they wrote that B on the front of their bottle... That's reason enough to buy it." I took it home, chilled it, popped the cap and took a mighty swig straight from the bottle. This beer is smooth with a satisfying amount of carbonation, a little edge of citrus on the palate and a malty aroma. This is what, at the very least, all lager should taste like.

With craft lager it's easy to either over or under do things. Over do it and you get a sparkling pale ale, not a lager, under do it and you get a soda stream accident. Brooklyn have got it just right with this, it's refreshing but still interesting, which is rare.

I would go as far as saying that this is the new bench mark for craft lager, it may not be the absolute best but it is a beer that I would happily drown myself in. So, for all the craft breweries out there who want to make a craft lager, go as big as Brooklyn or go home.

Food Suggestion: I know little about American sport but I can imagine going to a baseball game and pouring a whole bunch of these into a double gulp bucket and chug it alongside an array of burgers, fries, hot dogs, donuts and things that have been deep fried that should never have been deep fried. I could drink and eat myself to death in the ravenous sun, slowly turning into a giant prune, whilst watching some guy hit a free throw touch down from the crease with his baseball racket... Sports!

Drink this if you like: The obvious comparison seems to be Sam Adams but you could also compare this to the Peroni Gran Riserva and other European staples like Bitburger and Budweiser Budvar (the good Budweiser.)


Monster Ale - 10.3%

At 10.3%, on paper at least, this has all the makings of walking the walk as well as talking the talk, not that I'm disinclined to believe the hype presented by the bottle but I've been burned before by bold claims such as these. The pour is, well, it's fun... I don't often describe pouring a beer as fun but it was this time, mostly because when you pour this beer it looks like what I imagine nuclear fission looks like to an alcoholic quantum physicist. It's so vibrant and effervescent, bubbling almost ferociously within the leathery brown body of the beer. Even the slightest movement and it starts going again. It's hard to dislike a beer that's excited to see you.

On the nose there are hints of orange peel and waves of toffee which combine and remind me of the sickly sweet aroma of Drambuie, which is no bad thing. I've never had anything that has claimed to be a barley wine before, or even in the style of a barley wine, so this first taste, I imagine, will be quite an experience.

WHOA! Jesus F'Bombing McNuggets! That is a BIG flavour! It's got strong hops and an after taste that edges towards what I would expect from a much stronger drink. To me it tastes like a slightly burnt, slightly caramelised wiese bier but without the cloudy body and with slightly less fizz.

I can't imagine having many of these in any given session but I can imagine having one and savouring it. It somewhat surprises me that this came out of a place like New York. I mean no disrespect to New York by that, this beer just seems perfect for drinking on a balcony overlooking a lake or on a farm... Overlooking some cows.

This beer is best enjoyed cool but not cold and with company that have seen you drunk and sloppy before.

Food Suggestion: Artisan bread, a big loaf of something with other bits in it made by a large woman with flour on her nose who utilises her children as cheap labour in her struggling bakery, and butter made by sexually repressed religious zealots who think they live in the past. Yeah, that'll do it.

Drink this if you like: This REALLY reminds me of Skull Splitter by the Orkney Brewery. Also, drink this if you enjoy slowly losing your sight, memory and moral compass over the course of an evening...