Jura Superstition

Yup, that's right! I like whiskey too! Maybe it's something to do with it having a very similar process to beer or maybe it's because I like ordering whiskey at a bar whilst under the, thoroughly deluded, impression that it
 makes me look a) cultured, b) intelligent and c) Like a total BADASS.

This story starts off with me forgetting my Dad's birthday... Twice. It was only really in the matter of 2 days so I'm not sure if it counts as me forgetting the birthday twice. However, in recompense for my absent mindedness, I made a tithing of a lovely single malt called Jura Superstition. My father is a fan of smoky, peaty, whiskies; the kind that taste like the burning embers of a, once mighty, forest fire. I'm not. Now, knowing that it was in and around the area of 100% likely that I'd nick a glass of this, I went for a single malt that I was told was both peaty and smooth.

It's slightly caustic in smell and retains a nice satisfying burn, but it's a slow one, it's one that sticks around a little and let's you think about what you've done before eventually leaving with a bit of a whimper. Not to say that this is a weak whiskey, it's not! It's 43% and that's not to be sniffed at, but it's just not awfully complex. I read a review of this and the guy said he could taste ginger, samphire and maritime... I'm sure he was trying to say Marmite but he'd be wrong then too. Whiskey tastes like whiskey which (guess what?) TASTES LIKE WHISKEY! Yes, you get floral elements in some and hints from oak in the other but that's from the process in which it is made. However, for such simple base ingredients, you do get a massive range of tastes and effects. I'd say this one has just the right amount of peat to the taste, any more and it would taste like floor cleaner... Floor cleaner that went down smoother than a pole dancer who spilt melted butter all over her thighs! ...But still floor cleaner.

Now here's my point: There are two types of people in this world. They are people who buy a mac and people who buy a PC, people who drive an automatic and people who fix up old bangers, people who buy automatic lemon zesters and people who call people who buy automatic lemon zesters "wankers." When you buy a whiskey like this, what you get is a nice time of things, it's like a trip to centre parks; it's relatively inexpensive, fun, slightly dangerous but a lot safer than spending much more on a trip to the Amazon to get stung to death by a million angry, poisonous, jungle badgers. You're either the guy who's wearing the comfy slippers or you're the guy who's taking his slippers apart to see how he can make them go faster. This single malt is definitely for the guy who left his slippers alone. If you just want to relax with a nice whiskey then you definitely can't go wrong with this, it's smoother than most bourbons, even, but complex enough to put it well above the Bells/Teachers/Famous Grouse, blend, crowd.

If you're not a peat fan AT ALL, if the very thought of it repulses you, then this still makes a very good gift for most men over the age of 40... And some under that age but it's a much safer bet if you keep that age as a rough guideline. However, a better guideline would be to measure the sageness of the gentleman in questions beard.

Food tip: Ox tail soup! I generally find that whiskies are winter warmers and, thus, have to be paired with traditional winter food. This would also go well with a thick Irish stew or a hearty beef casserole with suet dumplings. Why did I add this bit to the end of my reviews?! It just makes me hungry!

Drink this if you like: Talisker and Laphroaig but have been warned that you have to cut down on your peat intake by a doctor. If you are a traditional Speyside fan then this could convert you a little as it's not as hardcore as it's Island compatriots but is still just a very nice glass and a half full. If you didn't understand anything I just said and think that Bells is good whiskey then you have wasted both your time and mine... Good day to you sir!